tired feet, tired mind.

Today was a weird day. I was awoken (is that even a word?) from a perfect slumber, by my loving aunt, telling me I look like Aunt Jemima.... I mean as wonderful as that is to hear in the morning, I wasn't about it. She proceeded to sit on my bed and tell me about the announcement the LDS church made yesterday. I'm sure you've all heard about it by now?? --That underage children of same-sex couples are not eligible for memberships into the LDS faith until legal age--First I must make a disclaimer for everyone. I love this gospel, and I LOVE MY FAMILY. I am not posting this to anger anyone, it's just on my mind and I work through things best when I write about them.

After I absorbed the information and read the article for myself, I was shocked, angered and heart-broken because this hit close to home. I didn't fully understand what I was supposed to be taking away from this announcement. I'm hoping that more information is to come, because I know this will not only effected me, but members all over the world.

For all the people who are posting their opinions and saying harsh words about members of the church or people in same-sex relationships. Please stop. Not all people are bad. You can have an opinion all you want, but what about the people its effecting. Me. Possibly your neighbor. A brother. A friend. I am a member of this gospel and I have members of my family in same-sex relationships. They are my family, and I love them with all my might and soul. My brave mom is an wonderful person. She raised me to have an open mind about everything. She helped me convert to the church when I was 13.When I had questions, she was there to answer them. She adopted me when I was 4 days old. She's my hero, my best friend, my best example, and my comforter.

I love you, mom. Simple and plain. Love forever and ever.

I don't fully understand what the reasoning behind this new "rule", but my head has been spinning all day. People asking me if I'm okay, telling me they love me, telling me that our leaders know what's best. And I believe them, I really do. But right now I'm not going to lie, my faith is a little bit shaken. I'm hoping that there will be more clarity on this subject, because I love this gospel and I love my family.

Until next time,
-O

greatness.

Today was...special. As all Sundays are. I was sitting in bed trying to decide whether or not to go to church today. The normal excuses started to fill my mind. "I'm still super tired. My bed is unbelievably comfy" Very sad, silly reasons to not to go church. But then I found myself crawling out of bed, and putting on make up. I told myself I was going to go and enjoy myself, and I did. I think my heart knew that there was something I really needed to hear today, and I am so very happy I didn't stay home. I choose to listen to my heart and follow the spirit.

Today was testimony meeting, and many people were getting up to share what they knew and believed. As I was sitting there reflecting silently to myself, a girl stood up and started reading my favorite hymn. "How Great Thou Art". I am sure everyone knows the lyrics but I feel promoted to share them now. 

O Lord, my God, when I in awesome wonder
Consider all the worlds Thy Hands have made;
I see the stars, I hear the rolling thunder,
Thy power throughout the universe displayed

Then sings my soul, My Savior God, to Thee,
How great Thou art, how great Thou art.
Then sings my soul, My Savior God, to Thee,
How great Thou art, how great Thou art!

And when I think of God, His Son not sparing;
Sent Him to die, I scarce can take it in;
That on the Cross, my burden gladly bearing,
He bled and died to take away my sin.

Then sings my soul, My Savior God, to Thee,
How great Thou art, how great Thou art.
Then sings my soul, My Savior God, to Thee,
How great Thou art, how great Thou art!

When Christ shall come with shout of acclamation
And lead me home, what joy shall fill my heart!
Then I shall bow with humble adoration,
And then proclaim, "My God, how great Thou art!"

Then sings my soul, My Savior God, to Thee,
How great Thou art, how great Thou art.
Then sings my soul, My Savior God, to Thee,
How great Thou art, how great Thou art! 

My heart is beaming as I am reading over that again. After reading the hymn this girl proceeded to say something that has stuck with me all day. She said "I am truly humbled that someone so great, sees greatness in me." That was so powerful to me. Our Savior does see greatness in all of us and he knows our full potential. Whenever we are filled with doubt, sadness, fear, sorrow, grief, joy, or anything we can turn to our Savior and He will be there to comfort us or be happy with us. He will wipe away my tears and lift me when I am low. He knows what I can accomplish and he sees the best in all of us. 

We need to keep our eyes focused on Christ, and we will never waiver. Life can get scary and we can get caught up in the worldly things. In Sunday School we learned about fear in a conference talk this past April. Fear can over come us and we can get blind sighted. We named some common fears that we as young adults have like: the future, dating, school, student loans, job market, and other things. We then listed ways we could over come those fears. We decided that we would need faith and trust in our Lord. Fear and Faith cannot exist together, because when we are fearing we are not trusting in God's plan. This great and all powerful being knows what is in store for us, yet we continue to second guess Him. I do it too, because I am nowhere near being perfect. But I aspire to be more like Him every day. Some days are hard and I just take it one step at a time. 

Today helped me to check in and think where I am at. I fear a lot of things in this world. The world has gotten very hard for our generation but I know that we are all here to make a difference. We are strong and capable of change. We just have to take it one step at a time. Through the Savior I can do hard things. We just need to keep our eyes focused on Him. I was so grateful for this lesson because it really hit home. I know I can be doing more to stay focused on the Savior. He will silence my fears, lift me up, make me smile, and He will continue to make me brave. 

Until next time,

-O

He built me to last.

                                 

With General Conference this past weekend, I've had a lot of time to think. For me the main points that stuck out were: gratitude, self-improvement, and love for yourself and for others. I struggle with all of these sadly, but luckily I can try to be better everyday. President Uchtdorf's talk was all about gratitude. I always feel like his talks are meant just for me. He always touches on a problem, or question, that I have and totally hits it on the head. All the speakers during conference really help me, but I feel most in tune with Pres. Uchtdorf. In his talk what really stood out to me was how  being grateful for our trials will help us overcome temptation and tribulation. "Gratitude is a catalyst to Christlike happiness" he said this several times, and I've come to realize that he is right. Have you ever noticed that sometimes when you think about trials that you've had in the past, you become grateful because they made you who you are as a person and nothing can change that? Yeah, me too! Our trials and successes, our ups and downs make us who we are today, and we need to be thankful for it all. I know it can be hard, being thankful for something that causes us distress, and uneasiness. Just remember that in the times that are the hardest our Savior is right by our side, holding our hand telling us we can do it. That's what need to be grateful for! In times of heartache, that is when our Savior is walking side by side with us. We need to thank him for that and the fact that we are becoming stronger, and happier. Obviously we won't be instantly happy, but saying a quick prayer of gratitude can make a world of difference. I struggle with this too because in trials in when we feel the most alone. But in trials that is when we are most comforted. I know it's hard, and doesn't seem to make sense, but I know that it is true. Pray for strength, love, happiness, charity, help, but mostly pray with gratitude. 

 Until next time, 

-O